It was kismet. The young lad rode his bike to her house to
ask her on a first date and thirty-four years later they rarely ride on separate bikes:
their love dictates a tandem.by Mary Mesa
It was kismet. The young lad rode his bike to her house to
ask her on a first date and thirty-four years later they rarely ride on separate bikes:
their love dictates a tandem.
Born and raised in Long Beach, Ralph and Kris met in college. Kris recalls her college days in San Diego when, upon emerging from her night job, she would find Ralph waiting for her, asleep in the car, having driven to see her for the weekend.
"We were so poor we would do things like dance on the outside patio of the Del Coronado Hotel. Years later, when Ralph was in the business world, we actually got to go inside!"
Ralph rode his bike to college, work and "the beer bar." Later, he did some amateur racing, including the 1994 Land Park Criterium. Kris wasn't as involved in cycling, riding only occasionally and on a couple of family cycling vacations. She had always preferred walking and running, until a broken ankle and recurrent swelling convinced her to make the switch. And now, fresh from this year's SW Banquet where she captured the award for "female with the most tour miles" and she and Ralph claimed "highest tandem mileage", it's clear that she has vigorously embraced the change.
Their first tandem was a used Cannondale that they rode on their twelve-mile treks to Carol's. Slowly but surely the mileage and endurance increased. Kris credits Ralph for his patience with her. They did get advice and some demonstration on riding techniques, and seem quite comfortable and confident on the tandem, although they agree that Kris is sometimes wont to making navigational errors when she becomes immersed in the scenery. "As the stoker you really have the chance to take in everything around you," says Kris. "And, you get to blow your nose," she proclaimed, in the tone of the salesperson who is giving you the ultimate reason for buying.
Ralph is undoubtedly the more competitive of the two, and glimpses of this can be seen not only from his riding history but his career path as well. As an executive with GTE Data Services he ran many large-scale computer centers, including the Data Center on Freeport Blvd., which included the territory from the Mississippi River to Hawaii. The couple moved several times, ending up in Mexico City where Ralph ran the Latin America division. He delights in telling the story of being sued for $12,000,000 and witnessing first hand the level of graft and corruption existing in Mexico. The company was looking to buy land for a new center. They found a parcel outside the city that was part of what is known as "hacienda lands". What that means is that in order to sell it a notice must be posted, and first right of refusal must be given to the farmers, their relatives and neighbors. Ralph and company subsequently discovered that the seller was threatening
and bribing the farmers to sign away their rights. What the seller hadn't anticipated was the "peasants" hiring of a big time attorney and their ultimate refusal to sign away any rights without a $1,000,000 payment to them. Because of the cloud on the title GTE backed out of the deal. The seller then sued GTE and GTE lost the case after the seller's attorney "wrote the judge's decision", i.e. bought him. The Chairman of GTE then phoned the President of Mexico and indicated they would very much like to do business with his country, but.The suit went away and GTE eventually bought land in Mexico City.
As all of this was occurring, Kris decided to go for a Master's Degree in Psychology. She had a maid, a cook and a busy husband in Mexico City, so the time was right. Having been an elementary school teacher in the early years of their marriage, she had later become very interested in learning disabilities, which both of their adopted children, Alison and Grant, have struggled with throughout their lives. As a result Kris was eventually hired by the local community colleges to work in their learning disabilities program.
Upon retirement the couple purchased a 40 ft. top-of-the-line motor home and began a one-year tour of the United States. Ralph was prepared to live long-term in the gleaming machine but by three-quarters of the way through the trip "I'd seen my last museum". In Florida they were offered a good price for it, so they sold it and got in their tow car, a Ford Escort, and made for home.
Currently they are enrolled in Body Concepts' training program for the Davis Double. The Death Ride is also a goal, as well as their more long-term goal of riding across the U.S. They completed both the Oregon and Europe club tours this past year, as well as several Zodiacs, which they agree are tremendous opportunities to get to know other members and simply have a rollicking good time. Ralph and Kris led several rides, and this year will take over the food distribution duties from Dave Bailey for the Sierra Century. Last year Kris also volunteered at the Wheelmen rest stop for the Ride Against Hunger.
My experience of them has been so positive and uplifting I was compelled to ask them about their philosophies and their ability to remain so upbeat. Both cite their faith and connection with their church, First Covenant, where Kris teaches a Bible Study class and Ralph is involved in various projects. A great sense of humor helps, as well as some terse adages, such as Ralph's "you can't fix dumb". In other words, why get upset and be negative when someone does something dumb? You can't fix them and getting riled doesn't do any good. "Rally around good things," he said. "Don't sweat the small stuff." (It must have been the latter that helped them up the 15K, 4,000' climb of Hautacam on the European tour. They made it, a little late, but the better for it, since the previously served chicken and spaghetti had run out and they were served duck and spaghetti. Bringing up the rear is not always a bad thing.) Kris says that, along with faith, a longer-term perspective has helped her, especially when she was feeling overwhelmed by her children's challenges. "I had lost hope," she said, "and finally realized I wasn't any good to anybody that way." They also feel they are now easier on people, kinder and gentler, if you will, one of the benefits of slowing down a bit and taking stock.
What you might not know is that Ralph is quite the romantic. When they were living in Mexico, he smuggled in the huge rock that Kris now sports as a surprise for their 30th wedding anniversary. He was so excited he couldn't wait for the actual day and, like a kid, kept asking "Don't you want to know what I got you?"
When asked what it was about Kris that people might not know, he got a big sheepish grin on his face and she quickly interjected, "Keep it clean". What more could he say than "she's cute", leaving us to imagine what may be the real reason for their joyful demeanors.
Their youthful attitude is even more apparent when you see them in a classic canary-yellow 1959 Chevy pickup. (Ralph's other passion is restoring old vehicles. He is currently at work on a 1948 Ford Coupe.) You need only see the gleam in his eye as he begins to drive away, stops, motions to you to roll your window down, guns the engine for you to hear, and then zips off, with yet another big grin on his ever more youthful face.